We are reminded of a lost love, while visiting the Sabbath. A time when love’s energy radiated in a warm smile, and promises made had not been broken.
“Somebody I used to know…” within the lyrics of an old song, the memories shared now through the voice of a new artistic – a subtle change to sing about Anxiety .
A very timely connection… 💕
She was a sensitive individual, working on her MA in fine Arts. We met by accident in the original Concord, when she sat close to me and we made contact.
We moved to the music, before finding our first embrace. I drove her home, and we agreed to meet again. We saw Moloko as our sound, the band that introduced us.
I was in my second marriage, and feeling the effects of shift work. I was not looking for a new relationship, however I could not ignore the chemistry between us.
My efforts to drop the connection did not work, and soon I had to see if I could shift my world to accommodate my new partner.
I loved my wife and children, however I knew that she was unhappy. I also felt that I should be closer to the children from my first marriage. We sold our home, and she returned to Ireland.
When I returned to visit, it was clear that if I was to return I would have twice the difficulties that I had in the past.
Meanwhile, my new relationship was evolving and the complexities of my past lives were now extended.
Taking early redundancy gave me time to recover from nights of intense work. I was starting to fall asleep on my drive home, and forgetting my place in the week.
I bought a two bedroom flat, rather than continue renting. One room was for my children’s visits. This worked for my youngest three, the eldest had more active social lives. Perhaps I should have tried harder to encourage them.
Having moved from Mainframe Computing to Commercial Contract Management, with Legal Studies to compliment the role I was getting busy again.
My professional life was on one track, and my personal another. My mind was always trying to balance both, Material and Spiritual.
This storyline goes a little off track now, and I will look to return after a little detour…
Parents
I was honest, a trait that I value more than the polite mask society would insist we wear. At least, I thought I was…
When we are unaware of all the facts, the truth is sometimes veiled. “Trust your Heart“, my parents would say, and “Think with your Head“.
The Duality behind this advice, made some of my decisions more difficult than others.
While my parents respected honesty and the Truth, they also entertained ‘white lies‘. This was not something that I was comfortable with, having been told the Devil is ‘the father of lies‘.
The most precious part of our life, our incarnation, is our Soul. The Devil and God were at war, and the Soul was the prize.
Drama & Variety 🎭
It took some time to discover that a Mask put on my face with good intentions as a child, had taken a life of its own.
My parents managed their very successful Drama & Variety show, and I would watch my mother wipe tears from her eyes and put her face on before joining my father on stage.
Artistic & Autistic
I was always different, born premature and considered Highly Sensitive.
Shape-shifting as a surviving twin with respect for American Indian traditions is something not a lot of people can appreciate or understand.
When a Mask takes a life of its own, following a Mirror 🪞 transfer ritual, reality as we know it shifts. The entity that takes form has a life force and an agency of its own.
I felt fragmented again, reality had shifted leaving me in a state of confusion. I was again lost for words, unable to articulate my feelings.
Broken
They laughed at me, and my condition.
Setting someone free is noble, however giving an adversary the psychological keys they need to manipulate a former partner does not sit well. Even if the adversary has problems of her own.
When the injury also involves the innocent it becomes a mortal sin, which is an injury that cannot easily be forgiven 🙏.
The Authentic Self… can Honesty and Happiness work together in harmony?
So what can be done? An honest conversation seems like a good place to start.
I do not like how Sonic was treated, and I do not like finding Kiki becoming a nervous wreck. She does not deserve harsh words or tones in her remaining years. How they both have ended up with similar terminal conditions is beyond me.
Sonic was cremated too soon against my wishes, I did not even have an opportunity to attend.
Separation Anxiety and Wounds can be treated with herbal remedies, and it is good to know how to avoid infection with the Best Herbal Remedies and Protection measures available. I have shared this information, and await the opportunity to discuss it.
I was ‘blanked‘, apparently “not enough time” to read, consider, and discuss. So the ‘wheel of time’ turns again, before we next meet at the crossroads.
Gabriel has taken over my site, leaving me more time to focus on what needs to be done. I still have some pages to write and update. This is one, I will return to again soon.
“To be continued…”
I have gotten ahead of myself, and need to ⏸️ my thoughts. I need to look at my footprints on the rice paper of my internal Shaolin Temple.
Holding my skull 💀 in my hands, I see Plato’s Cave and the reflections of my changing world dance like shadows on the wall.
Relationships are difficult. When hearts and minds merge, the one becomes something more… and when ‘the one’ is broken ☯️ the division is extremely painful.
Life
Sexual Energy is a magical force, a Kundalini which connects and makes an exchange possible. It can also be used to give life 🧬 as seed and egg unite.
Returning soon…
Identropy 